Trying hard.

Hello, I'm back. Is been months letting the blog dead.

I'm tired to keep everything to myself.

Since I can't tell anyone, so, i rather write it out.

Things aren't go right for me.

Dear Lord father, I know you will come and save me.

Please take me with you. I don't wanna suffer like how am I now.

Jesus, do give me a way so that I won't face such hardship.
I really need you right now.

Bye, haters. You no longer can control me.

I love me, hate me.

Take it, I'm just the way I am.

Ahh. Finally is the end. =')

Nahh. I'm not dead. And so do my blog.
Just lazy to think of something to write.
So fast, one week holidays ended.
Going to face fake people is school.
Ahh. Freaking tired.
Well, I gave up the most important thing in my life now.
Trying to be more independent for now, I guess.
Hopefully everything will be going fine as I really can't afford to see the person I love suffer being with me.
Let time do the job. That's all I guess. Bye, bloggie.
I'm going to visit you when I feel like visiting you :)

I wanna be his one and only wife.

I love you, BABY! <3

Let me feel happy before making me cry?

Woah. Today in the afternoon was awesome!
He was so funny and of course sweetttt as well.
But come to night time. He's going to watch movie with mandala people.
Eating sushi with them?
He promised that he will watch movie and eat sushi with me.
But too bad, he done it with mandala people.
I should be happy that he get to enjoy and son't have to work till over stress.
But, I have not idea why i'm not.
Just got to know that sonia and charlotte can't get to come to my house.
Am i really that friendless? I just need care and love, is it that hard?
I don't know why, I consider as friendly and caring.
I just don't understand. Maybe I just don't belong to the world?
If I die, will the people be better?
I'm not being childish. But isn't it the best way?

Is just too difficult for me.

This year doesn't seems like is a good year for me.

Everything just gone wrong. Very wrong.

Live changed, people changed, everything changed.

Yes, He changed. 

How I wish that this post can let me express out how I really feel.

Yesterday, I saw him. He changed to be so awesome.

But today, while on the phone with him, everything just stay back the same.

Feels like he doesn't wanna talk to me.

And he told me that he did not drink yesterday because when he reached, sat for awhile and he went back.

Is this mean that because of me, he is late and he can't get to enjoy?

Am i really that unwanted?

What can I actually do?

I do want him to be happy.

But I am just too jealous.

I felt like I'm so useless. You know, I really hope that last night I was there.

He will be hugging me tightly, putting my head on his shoulder.

I'll be singing to him. With my tears falls on his shoulder.

Isn't that great? Then, he will be holding the glass for me to drink.

Feed me with the food. Laughing with him and his friends.

Not holding on the line listening to them laughing and sing together happily.

While I'm on the bed, hugging teh teh. 

But I've promised him that I will change. Not to be so sensitive and think too much.

 Keeping the sadness to myself. Just, wish him happy always.

Bie, when you are sad, share with me.

If you are happy, enjoy it. Is okay to share with others about your happiness.

I'll always be there for you. Trust me, I'll be a good listener. 

Take Care. <3

I miss the moment we spent together!

I know. Is been a very long time I left my blog dead.
Just don't feel like writing, i guess.
Sadly to say that he is not feeling well.
Having sore-throat and headache.
At this time he is still working and not had his dinner yet.
To be frank, I'm very worried about him!
How nice if we can rewind everything back?
Like how we used to keep our dirty lil secret, and there's no one to be in between us.
I just hope to be with you no matter how hard it takes.

 I just want the moments to pause.

I love you. I miss you. I need you. I want you. <3

A perfect girlfriend wannabe?

Freaking sorry to left my blog dead, like again.
Now is 11 52p.m. , Yes! I'm waiting for his call again.
Isn't I ain't a perfect girlfriend or he ain't a perfect boyfriend?
I wish that someone can talk to me now.
Bored. On-lined, the whole day cause there's nothing better to do to pass my time.
I feel like giving up already.
Idk, I just wish everything is my fault..
I don't wanna hurt him, cause I love him. ='(

Back again cause bored like shit.

Freaking bored.
Went fb, twitter, and youtube.
Now, I have a plan.
But need some time to save up money to buy home studio recording equipment.
After I have all this, and I think it will be fun.
Keep supporting me and hopefully, it can be successful of course.
So, stay tune for more info!=)